It all happened 3years ago during my NYSC (a compulsory 1 year service for all graduate in Nigeria). I was posted to served as a teacher in the Northern part of Nigeria, Damaturu, Yobe state to be precised. I was in Primary 5 classroom teaching them Verbal Reasoning, when it all happened, and until now I still can't comprehend how such act will be encouraged.
It was a very sunny day at work, just like every other day in this part of the world, when from no where we started hearing the sounds of drums, singing and jubilation which was like the sound of a rushing waters, they entered the school premises and danced dramatically towards my class, chanting Mata ku (meaning our wife) as they approach my class alongside the principal and the school director, I became calm and let down my guild, unknown to me that something terrible is about to play out.
Before I could say anything, the women among them walked into the classroom and carried Ashat to the awaiting car and they zoom off the school premises, so I enquired about what just happened from the school director, and he said the girl as been married off to a certain chief
I couldn't believe my ears, I thought I was dreaming, I mean she's just 9years old! I became furious, I was basically mad and demand something be done about it, but during the weekend, the School Director reminded of:
- where I'm(there territory)
- how the northern people care less about human life, and could kill me if I do anything to stop it
- how it's their tradition, and i should respect it.
- How I should focus on the purpose why the government sent me there rather than prying into what isn't my business.
With the threat to life I received from the indeginous teachers, I had to back down from my initial action(*I felt when there is life, then there is hope of rising another day for the same cause).
Personally, I don't buy the idea of early marriage, but the director when on to backup their tradition being better compare to the southern part where I came from,
From his words I understand but disgree that the northern people are right to some point but wrong at many levels. And if we complain or talk, they do defend themselves by asking, how many southern girls are still a virgin at 13 to 16s?. Of which is true.
So they said, they'll rather marry off a child at an early age than let/watch her become a prostitue as a teen/teenage. But where they are wrong is that, -such child once married, as been placed in a bondage forever, because she can no longer go to school(their tradition forbid their the wives face being seen by others, so going to school could expose her face while playing/mingling with her agemate).
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She can't pursue her dreams again cause she as a family to take care of, it affect her education and state of mental health. Other effect of early marriage if you check the statistics in Nigeria, are;
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Divorce: the highest rate of divorce and remarriage is in the Northern part of Nigeria, because at the time of the marriage it wasn't with her concent
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Death: The highest rate of death at birth, of mothers at delivery point, is in the north, because they are yet to become fully mature.
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Domestic Violence: The young bride tend to go through domestic Violence from their husband and senior wife's.
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Murder: The rate at which girl child murder the allege husband due to trumal of domestic Violence and other forms of abuse is on the rise
In the Northern part at 23years old most ladies are already grandmother's, while in the south you can have a 23year old still chasing acedemic or Career.
I'm not against the north or it culture but there's a need for much adjustment in this particular act .
The south also have a long way to go , because we see the high rise in child, adolescent rape rate increases which means we aren't Saint as well.
What am saying in essence is that, in my experience in the north. I've witness many girls with the age of 10 in primary school get married to old men whose other children are older than the allege new bride.
So I my bid to eradicate Child marriage, I'm planing on doing the following when next I visit the north;
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Empower the parent and girl child with information on effect of early marriage
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Encourage the government to create a law the stand against early marriage
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Grant child child access to quality education
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Financially, skillfully and materially empower the girl child.
Thanks for stopping by my post, You can as well drop a comment on how to best eradicate this tradition. Also I'll be channelling all income from this post to this cause.
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