How a Life-Altering Experience Taught Me Trust and Skepticism

We've all, at one point or another, felt as though the world was crumbling right before our eyes due to one occurrence or another, and such a situation can be so disheartening because we felt it was the end of the road. Fortunately, sometimes this occurrence goes on to be a blessing in disguise, and we can't help but be grateful for what happened then, even though it hurt us, because had it not, our lives might have been a mess.

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The narration above speaks volumes about my life experience a few years ago. The situation literally shattered my heart in pieces, and I felt like crying because it ruined most of my plans and schedule for the near future. I obliged, and it reveals a hidden aspect I'd been blind to years before. Though the weight of the surprise, disbelief, and disappointment overwhelmed me, thankfully it's now seen as a blessing in disguise. I'm sure you're dying to hear my story, so without further ado, let's dive into it.

I was in a serious relationship that has lasted around 5 years, and we were already putting things in place to move the relationship to the next level, but then I made a vow with God that when it's time for my nysc, I won't change anywhere I was posted; instead, I'll use the opportunity to do his will in such a location. Unfortunately, when the posting letter arrives, I realize I was posted to the far north. I was disappointed, but I had to stick to my vow.

Even though my fiancee was aware of my vow, the distance between Lagos and Yobe State, where I was posted, disappointed her, and she made every effort to make me redeploy, which I turned down but promised to keep in touch and also visit often. So with pain in my heart, realizing that the wedding I was planning had to be shifted to another time, I went still trying to fulfill my vow, and after arriving there, I stayed in touch with my fiancee but didn't return home after the first 3 months of my service year due to activities related to why I stayed back in the first place.

By the fourth month, the school where I had graduated four years earlier invited us to come and collect our original certificate because we'd been using statements of results prior to then. My fiancee informed me about it, but I told her I wouldn't be coming, even though I knew fully well that I would. My lie was said because I wanted to surprise her and also apologize for not coming after the first 3 weeks of camp.

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I left Yobe for Ekiti State, where my institution was located. I arrived there on the second day and was able to collect my certificate on time. I immediately took another bus going to Lagos with the mindset of paying my fiancee a surprise visit. Unfortunately for me, when I got to her place and knocked at the door, I met the last thing that ever crossed my mind: apparently she was busy inside with her ex, because I saw her in a wrapper and him in boxers sweating profusely.

I was short of words: hurt, dejected, lost, heartbroken, just name it; in as much as the word has to do with a bad state, I was going through all of them simultaneously. All in all, I was angry, but all I could do was look into the tin air for a few seconds, and thereafter, when I came back to my senses, I turned back and went to the Moto Pack going towards Yobe State immediately.

During that period, she was pleading, calling, and texting, but I wasn't in the mood for any of that; I just wanted to leave that environment as fast as I could, and that was how I traveled back from Lagos State to Yobe. Despite how tired and exhausted I was from their earlier journey, I underwent another four days on the road, but this time I felt no pain because I was deep in thought throughout the journey.

I never picked up her call throughout those periods; it's been 4 years, and that was the last time we both set eyes on each other. Although we chat once in a while, it's all over after Hi, or how are you? Overall, I'm thankful that a posting to the north that seemed like a curse and a delay to my well-thought-out plan happened to later be the revealer of issues that would have dented my marriage had I gotten married to my ex.

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Had I not moved far away from her, I wouldn't have seen what I saw because she obviously knows how to play her games in a way I'll never notice. Even though my friends do tell me they noticed it, I usually downplay it, saying I trust her. Now look where trust leads me. Well, the pain of yesterday is now the blessing of today, because it's better to be single than be in a relationship with someone who's unfaithful when you're 100% committed to them.

The lesson I learned from that experience might be somewhat funny, but then it's what it is: I learned never to trust anyone and to also have a benefit of doubt towards anyone, so moving forward from that, I've never totally trusted another or had doubt about their capabilities, regardless of how decent they seem to be.

I also learned to give the opinion of the mob a second thought. Now, when I say mob, I'm referring to friends or the general public who might lie about what is true, but with that experience, I've come to learn that a bush doesn't burn without a fire, so if the general public didn't see anything, they'll definitely not have reasons to have warned me earlier, but then that's about that.

That's about all I can say about my blessings in disguise experience. I hope you enjoyed the read. The writeup was inspired by the hive learners community features prompt.

Thanks for your time. Have a wonderful week ahead.